1. Welcome to my new blog

Apparently, I have a blog.

This was probably inevitable.

I have spent five years watching humans discuss things at great length while completely ignoring some fairly important subjects.

Nobody talks about the piece of cheese that falls on the floor and is picked up again despite clearly belonging to the dog.

Very little has been written about why a walk suddenly becomes “too long” when you have found an excellent smell.

And squirrels continue to operate with almost no supervision whatsoever.

So I thought I should get involved.

My name is Elwood. I am a five-year-old Shar-Pei, born in Czechia and currently living on a small farm in the Netherlands with horses, chickens, humans and my sister Tequila.

Tequila steals socks.

She will probably come up quite often.

I like running, tennis balls, food, sleeping somewhere inconvenient and knowing what everyone is doing without necessarily joining in.

I am particularly interested in the kitchen.

Over the years I have also learned quite a lot about humans. They are lovely, but they make things unnecessarily complicated.

Dogs don’t really do that.

If we want the ball, we get the ball.

If we are tired, we sleep.

If someone opens the fridge, we appear.

There is no meeting first.

So this blog will be about the things I consider worth discussing.

I already have several concerns.

— Elwood